Perhaps missing the bullet was wrong in this case

Sometimes I should just leave well enough alone. I'm not sure about much anymore. You know, I started this site with very open and honest feelings because I knew that no one read it back then. Now, I sanitize my thoughts before posting them on here. I have various reasons why, but I think I will start to openly post my thoughts again.

This could have some serious repercussions now. I was thinking about secretly starting another site and starting over with my thoughts. I used this site as an online journal of some sort initially. I was thinking about doing it again with a different site. I decided not to do that. Why? I'm not sure. It just didn't feel right.

I don't know... perhaps some things are best left unspoken or in this case, unwritten.

I feel as if I dodged a bullet today. In all my life, I have never drunk dialed anyone. I have never drunk texted anyone either. But last night, I ended up drunk e-mailing someone. Not someone from the past, but someone in the present. Anyway, the details are not important. I was fortunate that the person agreed to delete the e-mail without reading it. An extreme act of kindness, no doubt. I don't even know if I would have done something like that. For this person, I probably would. I digress... so now I am wondering if perhaps I should have let her read the e-mail.

All the cards would have been laid out on the table. No going back after that deed is done. But now the e-mail is deleted. Sure I could resend it, but the impact of the message would be lost now. Now I am in no better position than I was yesterday. How can I make forward progress if I keep settling for status quo? Is losing all that you have with someone considered forward progress? I guess no one says that forward progress is always happy progress.

Then again, I have always said that my lack of patience has bitten me in the ass more than a few times. Oh and I also have a stalker trying to get with me, but that is a story for another time.