Most people need 3 feet of personal space... I need 30 feet

I have come to realize that I have gone to the opposite extreme
regarding relationships. I have been hurt so much lately, that I
think I may have pulled a 180 and totally run away from any form of
relationships. It was so much better when I didn't let myself get too
close to anyone so I never had to worry about relationship issues. I
would subconsciously sabotage any form of closeness with women. Well,
that will only get me so far in life.

Seriously, anything more than just "friends" is starting to freak me
out. Suffocated even... (said in a Snaggelpuss voice). I know
it's just my insane in the membrane head and lord knows why I'm
putting this down in writing for the world to see.

Maybe, I'm a deeply rooted masochist that enjoys self-abuse (After
all, who doesn't enjoy a little self-abuse now and then? Better stop
that or you'll go blind). You see, I know how to handle the pain of
loneliness. I do not know how to handle the pain of a failed
relationship. It's all too dynamic and unscripted.

If only someone would invent the perfect relationship. I'd buy a six
pack of 'em. That way, when I mess one up, I'd just toss it out and
open up another.

(Disclaimer....)
IF YOUR A WOMAN, STOP READING RIGHT HERE.....
SERIOUSLY, IF YOUR STILL READING THIS, I TAKE NO RESPONSIBILITY FOR
YOUR ANGER.

In my next life I want to come back as a woman. They have so many
options to chose from when they get down on themselves. There is
always the porn industry, the strip club industry, prostitution.
Sometimes I think I'm really a reincarnated stripper (I like the name
Candy) because this lonely life makes me gravitate toward the "pole".

Oh wait... Actually it's not the pole I like, it's the stripper on
the pole. And I'm a guy so I naturally like strippers. Maybe I'm not
so abnormal after all.